How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
