We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize