Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
