well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
