next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I need moral support for this bender
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
