Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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