What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
