ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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