i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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