i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
