Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Randomize
