I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Randomize
