Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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