But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Randomize
