are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
