O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
