GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
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