gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I can feel your judgement through the phone
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
