just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
