And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
