i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
