I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize