I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize