Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Randomize
