Pappa wants mamma naked
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Randomize
