Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Randomize
