you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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