garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
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