Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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