thus making me awesome and them whores
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
