you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
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