Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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