I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize