I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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