does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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