I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
