Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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