I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
