he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Acid is not a monday night drug
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
