You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
