He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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