wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
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