how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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