I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
we're so committed to being not committed
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
