duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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