some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
