I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
