I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
