Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
