i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
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