u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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